How do i stop being afraid fo men?

Exposure therapy, let me hold your hand and play with your hair.

Whoa!!! Anon, I have a bf. But the torment I live is endless.

i started when i was 18, 7 years ago. i had very low T before then, and i had this weird gender thing going on. people mostly treated me like a girl*, even the guys. i went by a girls name too because someone misheard my name and i too anxious to correct them and everyone started calling me it.

when i did tell my friends i was trans it was weird since they didnt have much of a reaction, and i thought they misheard me until one of them said no one really saw me as a guy anyways so it doesnt really matter, and the others just said id make a cute girl and moved on

Then you literally have nothing to worry about. Guess it’s just me. Disregard my schizo post. You’re going to be fine.

please
please please please please
im so pathetic

But that's good girls that are a little pathetic are the cutest.

Samefag. I never had a girlhood. Just a ok you’re 23now here’s your HRT a decade late. Enjoy your meal.

thats not me (op) btw, i started at 18

Fuck off

but theyre a lot of stress and i dont want to bother a guy

I will, cunt.

I'll be your bf cutie

sorry I just inserted myself into the conversation because I also relate to the thread >w<

its okay !! i just wanted to clarify i hope i didnt sound hostile im sorry

Ahh yes ok. So maybe a mix between the 13yo and my fucked Franken-transition. By no means will you be a hon.

to be honest, lots of guys say this. but the issue is how scared i get of them, and how much i dont want to burden them

Relationships are about taking a bit of burden off of each other's back, i'd be more than willing to eat up some of this stress in a loving relationship, it's just part of it.
The good outweighs the bad as long as you do your best to be a good person.
At least that's how i think.

Yeah dumbass, because hrt is for feminine males that have feminine interests and feminine mannerisms naturally, but nature made a mistake and gave them male genitalia instead of female.

Hrt is NOT for weirdos, coomers, fetishists, losers, autists, and other assorted outcasts who want to grow tits because tits are hott. Fuck off.
Good go cry about your non-existent problems weakling

i dont think you should think of yourself like that. even if you dont think you pass, that doesnt mean you cant be beautiful, and theres more to life than that anyways. its not a "franken-transition" its something to make you happy. you should be less hard on yourself :(

So 13? You injected estrogen at 13? GIWTWM.. but I didn’t have the balls to do it. I’m holding myself hostage for the crimes I’ve committed against myself until I die.

i think thats a good outlook. i try really really hard to be a good person. i still do think my stress would be too much to place on a guy though :(

What’s your fucking deal? You really think I’m John 50? Just because I’m loaded with a fuck load of internalized transphobia? I fucking hate myself for having hated myself for being effeminate. I purposely for years lived a gender that wasn’t mine, distanced myself from anything feminine. Just because I was traumatized that assholes like you wouldn’t believe me that I am a girl.

I can't say in an aobjective manner if it is orn not but i think you'd be surprised how much positive affirmation cis women need in a relationship too, it's not that different, i think it's okay i really don't mind it personally if i love the person i'm with.
There are times for reassurance and they can also be seen as times for bonding so i really don't mind it.

When did you start hrt then? Why did you wait so long?

Thank you. I’ll do better.

23

I mentioned it here 37940776

that does sound like a really really sweet thing to experience...

how do i meet guys?

Look I already know I’m undeserving of the acceptance of the trans women my age who actually got what they wanted. I’m just a loser than never knew what to do. It’s just how abused children function desu.

I think that ironically the best way is to make more girl friends that will introduce you, i'm not a big fan of dating apps but they do work, no idea how it is fro trans women tho i imagine it's not a spectacular experience.
Having a job even part time or doing voluntary work can help when oyu want to meet people.
i'm sure yo ucan figure all that out yourself it's more about your specific situation after all.

Boo! I'm gonna rape you!

You're not even trans, this is all a last resort for you. I can totally accept that some real trans women are raised by unsupportive parents, and they can't transition until 18 for legal reasons, but they do transition by 18 usually if they were feminine gay boys who needed to transition. Not everyone who takes hrt is trans.

what if i wasnt a feminine gay boy but still transitioned as a minor

Ok but then why at a young age did I keep wishing I was a girl? This is why I’m so confused.

Fuck off
You didn't, AGP and autism are highly associated with dishonest personalities.

for what its worth, i dont think 23 is very long. and i likely grew up very similarly to you. my dad would always get really upset at me for acting feminine, and yell at me for it. sometimes he would argue with my mom about it. he tried really hard to make me boyish, i was in sports almost 24/7 and he would yell at me for being bad at them until i cried and then id get yelled at for crying. he tore apart my entire room looking for estrogen when i was 15/16 and didnt know about hrt.

i think i would have transitioned late or died, but a girl did pull me aside one day and grilled me asking if i was trans, and wouldnt let me dodge the question. i was already planning on killing myself after highschool, and i figured i might as well try hrt since its the one thing that might genuinely make me happy, and i started at 18.

wanting to be a girl always felt like the most shameful shameful shameful thing i could ever do, i was so paranoid about people finding out when i was little. i would even try hiding my nails because i thought kids would realize theyre too pink and *know* i did everything i could do hide it. i probably would have transitioned later if i wasnt directly pressured to transition. and i dont think 23 is that late anyways

I made a lot of mistakes when I was 18. I still lived at home. I still cared about what my parents thought. I held back

Fuck off

what did i do TwT

to be honest im not really sure how to make girl friends irl either, i dont go out much anymore since i dont have money. i'll try looking for jobs/voluntary work where i can leave my house, i think thats a good idea

Alright so I’m half baked. Thanks. Glad you got that shit at 18

its not really about getting raped, which is still somewhat scary, stuff has happened to me before.

its more about social anxiety, i cant imagine why a guy would want me, and i think most are better off without me. i ghost most people who develop feelings for me because i think its better for them

You are mocking them by making posts of a similar nature to mine but you are an early transitioner. The hon I’m arguing with is seething.

i dont think youre half baked, i think its just something thats really difficult to come to terms with. people are more judgemental of trans women or even feminine men than they are of actual rapists. its not easy. its completely understandable to transition at 23, even much later. and i dont think physically you would be much different had you transitioned a little earlier anyways

And on top of it, I don’t mind being half baked. I’m kinda all messed up mentally from this but I’m pretty happy that I actually survived without roping. It’s nice to hear your story and know that our similar pasts haven’t stopped us from living our lives.

Thank so much much <3

i dont think its healthy to separate people by "early transitioner" and "seething hon." the experience can still be shared i dont see why it matters, and i dont think its healthy to call people those things or view them in that way anyways. youre doing the most harm to yourself

It's perfectly natural to have trepidations concerning a stranger that can cause you bodily harm, it's not an inherently bad thing so much as it is your body's flight or fight response signaling to be cautious and it's important to establish a deep friendship with someone to have a bond with them before dating. I completely understand how you feel, though. I didn't date for a very long time and I rarely entertain the idea. You have value and you are important, and not because someone else sees value in you. Self-respect starts from within and you need to look in the mirror and say you're good enough. If your emotional state is dependent on someone else you're giving that person control over you and opening yourself up to being used. If you think you mostly pass then maybe you can believe in yourself more. In my experience dating apps have bad results. Take the time to really get to know someone and vet them. Are they worth YOUR time? I've been single a long time and I'm happy with my freedom. There's a lot of enjoyment from being tied down by someone abusive or bad for you.

Hiya, same autistic retard here. I’m not trying to divide the entire young vs old. I’m just pointing out patterns I’ve noticed on this board. I was trying to find a quick awnser to why anon was told to “fuck off”.

but i just dont see why it should matter, i just seems like something that can only harm. i know that probably wasnt your intention, i just get worried about this board

Correct. I apologize for making the statement in the first place. It’s not helping the board in anyway. Thank you.

thats very thoughtful thank you :) youre right i probably should respect myself more, sometimes its just really difficult. i know its unhealthy but self respect takes a really long time, and i dont want to wait forever to find a boyfriend. i want one so bad so so bad

thank you <3

Youre welcome anon, again thank you :3

With the exact same conclusions you are making I still pulled the trigger on a bf.

oh, well i guess that makes sense

I got to a point where I either date a guy or wait until I never do. Personally it’s not as complicated as I made it out to be. Guys are really nice, really simple. Please post here about your love interest, your soon to be boyfriend. I’m sure everyone will enjoy to hear you share your love.