Have any perma-boymoders here gotten top surgery...

gender identity isn't real outside your thought constructs. there is only the body, the dysphoria its neurons may contain, and the society. there is no true identity but "i am me"

never seen a "boymoder" who wasn't completely pre-everything just living as a man, not shaving, not voice training. usually trying to fuck trans women and thinking saying he's trans but just boymoding increases his chances.

not wanting to look like a man in a dress means you hate yourself!

This is me except I've been on hormones for three years

I have dysphoria therefore I will erase what little bit of feminity HRT gave me with surgery so I can look more like a man

I can't tell if you're retarded, actually cis or brainwormed to oblivion

i met a guy like this but he had been on hrt for 10 years and had bigger tits than me it was wild

Unless you live by a college you're really not going to see any boymoders generally

There's no point in having ugly east-west facing boobs on a male body, boobs on a male body are just a problem that isn't worth it

I don't see mine as a problem

on the other hand people who think they're boymoding but are manmoders are likely all over the place hiding in plain sight

If you pass ofc it wouldn't be a problem, if you don't pass and are happy with being a freak creature you just have agp because real transsexuals want to be actual women and not just gross moid crossdressers with boobs

I dont pass but I go out in a hoodie or a jacket and no one can see so it's not a problem
I cant even begin to understand your mindset

That's too horrible in the summer and isn't safe enough for friends and such long term, the boobs on my evidently male body are just a reminder of my failed attempt at ascending anyway. I don't see why you'd rather be a man with boobs than a man without boobs, it's just as horrible but with more inconvenience

I'm a manmoder but I call myself a boymoder because when I think about not being 19 anymore I have a nervous breakdown.

What's the difference?

I mean I am transitioning I'm in the middle of the process I didnt expect this to be instant I dont expect to live like this for another year but you dont get where you want to be in a week shit takes time

Mostly on how old and masculine you look
If people call you buddy/friend/boy vs man/dude/[name]

another year

It'a probably already over after a year in, you aren't going to see much new changes where it actually matters if you didn't get any in a year

when I think about not being 19 anymore I have a nervous breakdown

holy shit this hits so close to home ahh
i girlmode but i am constantly stricken by the regrets of my late teens and wasted early 20s. those years could've made my life but instead they broke it and i will be picking up the pieces until at least 30. unless age cure happens and i get the time back, it will haunt me to my grave i think

I really dislike your attitude

Yup there is no going back, you lost those years forever and your life wasn't what it was supposed to be. Now you will never become who you should've been and you'll love a botched version of the life you should've had. :/

i have this fear that one day the real me will discover interdimensional gates and she'll peep my universe and decide i'm not one of the ones worth contacting

You dislike reality, if you didn't get any changes to an area after a year you probably won't get them later, that's for you to try to measure though. Look at your pics before and after and if it still looks the same it's probably over

We have the life we have
there are no should've beens
Everyone makes mistakes but we keep going

No i dislike your attitude of "it's over I give up theres nothing I can do :(" it fucking annoys me because I used to be like that and it was being like that that held me back from starting my transition in the first place
I know I'll eventually girlmode just fine I ser my own body I know what I am but here comes some loser thinking they and everyone else is in the same sinking ship

you speak truth. but had i the option i would still set the world and everyone on it ablaze for a second chance, however awful that may be.

It's not worth it

Don't beat yourself over it plenty of people would do the same but we can't do anything but keep going and try our best

I don't want to be the best failure I can be. I'd prefer to be nothing than being a failure.

or what if all the regrettors form a cooperative and work together to develop mind transplants and devote thousands of peoples' energies to retvrn until all can be given the chance to be 20 again and start fresh

Everyone is a failure by some metric or another

Thats a capitalism nightmare imagine if the Amazon CEO got his hands on that lol

Everything can be made into a nightmare by capitalism, just erradicate all of the cops and burgpigs and use their bodies for our mind transplants

I'd rather just live it down mistakes and all
I'm curious where I'll eventually end up

thought about this a lot actually. my unironic life goal is unironically to develop mind links (only way to do a mind transplant that isnt copy+murder, i will put my og hon body in the fridge and live through linked stacyclone).
i believe its possible but oh my god i am SO terrified of corporations getting their grubby hands on it and putting ads in your dreams or making hive mind workforces or some shit.
gonna put filings on all my future intellectual property that neuralink is banned from accessing any of it

trvth nvke

whatever happened to shame
how are you going to go up to a surgeon and say "hey i know i've been taking the pills that makes your boobs grow, but can you cut my boobs off now? no i still want the pills"

unironically said unironically twice back to back

im a retard who doesnt proofread but i can make brain transplants, trust
you will all be stacy(20) in uh iunno 50 years so try not to die until then

It's crazy how many people sit in a single Philosophy 101 lecture and somehow deduce that only strictly material things actually exist, therefore all thoughts and social constructs are spooks, invalid, nonexistent, etc etc. It also is no coincidence that these people are the most mentally ill on the site because they can't accept the ways they feel as being legitimate.

maybe op is nonbinary and doesn't know how to express it as such because Anon Babble says it's illegal

Just some doomer brainwormed boymoder

muh nonbinary

Go back

It just seems like OP can't accept herself as worthy of existence if she isn't a conventionally attractive gigapassoid mogging most cis women. Of course, most of the reason she doesn't pass is probably because of how she presents herself, doesn't clean herself up and tells everyone she's male rather than being a true hon.

intangible phenomenalogical things may exist, i believe in god for example, but gender identity is an abstraction layered on top of a root phenomenon of selfhood. it's language and labels applied to describe individuality, and imperfectly so. to take it as your core is to set down the shovel before you've hit bedrock.
social identity is a tool for reducing the friction of connecting to others, not a crutch to fill in for an underdeveloped self.

This holy shit
Btw top surgery scars are ugly as fuck, if you are too big for keyhole it would be better to just wear a compression top under your shirt

in that case absolutely do NOT cut your boobs off you will regret it like crazy if you're actually dysphoric

If you had actual dysphoria you'd understand how looking male makes me feel like shit and looking like a man in a dress wouldn't make me feel better at all, of course cis libtards are incapable of seeing a medical condition for what it is when it doesn't match their ideology

read the thread you insipid faggot

Have you grown out your hair? Got laser done? Skincare and all that?

if you could afford mastectomy why not just get breast implants

Of course I did retard and that makes no difference at all, how about you stop projecting your low effort into me to protect your ideology?

I actually agree with you. I just fail to see how saying it is helping somebody in this case.

anybody with a different perspective from me is fake trans

C'mon m8. I get that you're upset about your dysphoria and trajectory in life, but where does saying this actually get you? Did you make this thread in hopes that nobody would "hugbox" you into thinking surgical detransition was a bad idea? Did you only make this thread looking for everybody to affirm the conclusion you clearly already came to that "if you just can't hack it as a woman then I might as well suffer as a man"? Does this thread only exist so everybody can affirm your BDD and nothing more?

How would those make me look like a woman? Real transsexuals don't want to be men with giant tits that's just being a monster not being a woman. I'm sorry Alice but bigger boob doesn't equal more woman and your ex-wife was right about you

I'm not projecting anything I'm just asking questions but I guess hormones just didnt do it for you

le different perspective

You are so poisoned by liberalism that it's just sad

What makes you look like a man are you 6'0+ with no curves or what

Nta but take the skullpill buddy- most men after puberty will never pass for female

I just fail to see how saying it is helping somebody in this case.

help always starts with truth imo. gender identity isn't real, so no point trying to use it as a foundation for someone in crisis.
what she needs to do is focus on what's real in her life -- she has the body she has, and the dysphoria she does, and she should treat the interaction of those things as if she were far from society on an island, just do what reduces the dysphoria. ultimately i think this line of thinking ends at "yeah she shouldn't cut her tits off" but less likely to breakdown in doubt again over it later
you're posting about weird small east west boobs and stuff so it seems like implants and a lift could probably help. the rest of your body isn't likely as unsalvageable as you think, bricks are less common than bdd here ime

I'm sorry Alice but bigger boob doesn't equal more woman and your ex-wife was right about you

as a midshit who trooned late teens this got a lol out of me

Your silence on all of the questions I asked is deafening. Focusing on one random blurb instead of the core of what I said to avoid confronting reality won't help you. You just want people to kick you while you're down, because abuse from yourself and others is the only thing that makes any sense to you. Which is why you say delusional shit like "healthy disagreement is liberalism" because that protects you from actually having to consider the fact that most of your pain is self-wrought.

Real transsexuals don't want to be men with giant tits that's just being a monster not being a woman.

Pretty much nobody wants to look like that. The logical conclusion isn't to off yourself if you aren't hot enough to make millions off of onlyfans.