Why dont they hate me

Question

Why dont they hate me

mtf tranny loser

overdose on antipsychotics hoping to die

drive to hospital after pleading from online friends

couldn't even find the entrance to the emergency room bumbling around like a fucking moron

go home

sleep

wake up 13 hrs later

half a dozen missed calls from BF and Mom

BF knew i overdosed and drove across the state to get to me but couldn't get into my apartment

Mom didn't know what was going on and just saw my location at the hospital at 1am

they don't hate me

they just keep on saying stuff like "im worried about you" and "talk to me if you're not feeling okay.." why don't they see the sad sack of shit that I am. Ive done nothing for them in months, I just leach off of their money. It's a wonder that I managed to get an amazing boyfriend.. wouldn't be surprised if he leaves me though. God I'm such a pathetic faggot

They know "hating you" would be letting you off the hook. Lovebombing is to reinforce that feeling of indebtedness in you so you will continue to live for their sake.

Anon can you explain the difference between lovebombing and love for me

Lovebombing is an effusive display of love and affection to make someone feel loved. It's not mutually exclusive with real love and that's not the point.

No one would care if I was dead theyd probably be happy that the tranny living in their house is finally gone

This is a lie. Everyone treats you worse after the hospital.

Oh boo woo woe is me post x 1000000

No one cares, next time take fent and drink alcohol. Please leave and don't come back we don't care they just need you to live so they can virtue signal through you! You can't have kids so that bf is temporary and he will leave. Your mom secretly thinks of you as her son moms don't change how they see their babies. You will die old and alone cold and lonely just like everyone else. Hell, everything is slowly killing you and you were better off dead. Now you will probably die some painful way but so is life god saves the most pain for the people who die late in life. This world is really a game there isn't much to it. The rich people are rich because their parents put money into their future this is what yours did not do! The people who are born their right gender and sex are like that because their mom was a decent good person who did not mess with drugs. You are tainted forever and will always be tainted you will never be anything else. This has been decided for you before you were even thought of. Trust me I am right you will never be anything but a failure!

Must be nice. Last time I overdosed no-one gave a shit.

cool beans.. um.. definitely won't be reading this for a long time and eventually commit suicide because of it.. thanks anon.. you have such a way with words.

See then you will post and say “I am going to make it” which is when all the lies that the government tells you actually stick. You never had a chance, you are transgender and parents hate that their kids transition because your parents want what is best they want you to experience a better life than them. They see the future of you being bullied for being delusional and thinking you are something you are not. They see the harm that can come to you and they can't do anything about it but stop you from moving in that direction. Your life and everything you want to be is decided for you. God is in contact with every leader. Everything is perfectly aligned so that you follow orders. What job you will get, what class you will belong to, how beautiful or ugly you will be, how fat or skinny you will be. Have you notice that some people are treated very well and they can do whatever they want while other people can't? That is all by design. God can see if you really believe in him and he can see the future. So the hardships he puts on you are to show you that you either believe in him or not. He already knows the answer it is for you to see it with your own two eyes.

See we already died. We are not doing something different, no we are seeing why we did what we did. We are right now standing being judged! See you will always be a tranny, you will never be a man or a woman just a tranny. God can recreate you thousands of times. You will always be a tranny!

He is okay with that. Every decision is not bad or good. He just deals with hypocrites. He knows that if he gave you everything you will still be evil. You will still have darkness on your heart. He knows this. You will never change. Lsd taught me that change is fake we just reveal what is already there in the first place!

why are you so mean

I am not mean there is no such thing as mean. There is no good or evil everything is set in pairs! You are no woman you are a tranny. God decided and it is final you will never be a woman in a thousand years your sister can but not you. You are picked to be a tranny forever even if you detransition you will always be a tranny! God’s law is final things are in sets and in classes. This is how the world works. Truth is both worth something and worthless. The best time of your life is when you did not think. This is god’s law the law of the cosmic joke. The only thing stopping you from achieving the best life is something that god put in you. You could have been born a real girl but then you would forget god so the only thing that brings you back to him is you being a tranny so that I can type this and you can read it. This is all the act of god. The will of god! Things need to happen the way it does so that we all can be saved! You being a real girl could have killed all of us! Thank god that didn't happen!

what the fuck is wrong with you, are you high

No, I am enlightened! I have seen god and he is small and sad. He is afraid of what he has made. He just wanted to keep everything moving nothing else. As long as humans live god is doing everything correct. People who have to suffer are suffering because they will forget him if they don't. He needs people to remember the good and bad that he did only so that we can move forward!

Once you find out that he is weak very weak and skinny. Fragile but kind. He sees all of this, he sees people cursing his name when he only wants humanity to live. He sees people crying in pain for what they did to their own self and then lie and say he did it. He sees the lost hope. He sees the fake and real emotions. The liars and cheaters. He sees how people let them be but anyone who does good is punished! He sees the hidden evil that people hide from you and me. He sees the people who say “good morning” while hiding their evil wickedness! He sees people say “god please give me this” but knows they will turn their back on their parents and steal from them so he prevents it by giving the parents pure vision to see the folly! He is truth, sad, and weak, scared of the future more than you. He creates but he is worried that his creation all has an ending! He knows that he too has an ending! Weak and scared the truth is always weak and scared!

can't believe i got bothered by a moron like you wow

Don't worry you will see what I see and I won't explain it to you. I told you the truth of the world I told you the secrets of humanity but you refused to see. Well it will probably take you dying to see but you will see what I see! I will be here waiting!

what is wrong with christcucks
at least op isn't this guy

what kind of person praises christ and tells you to kill yourself in the same paragraph what a horrid human being

wow, that's a real schizo. not too common actually

I am not a Christian I am more like a pagan. I see things in it’s absolute form. It is funny that you think I am crazy yet you buy water from people. Yet you buy food to survive from people. You live in a crazy world. You can die at any time. I am just here to give you the rules. To tell you that you have no choice. That you are everything god wanted you to be. I told you god doesn't hate you he hates hypocrites. If your life is hard that is because without a hard life you would forget him. He is fair and kind always giving you a chance even if it hurts!

well, you know, in my lsd induced schizophrenia, i believed that i was born to suffer and die and then return to the universe. well actually i believed i was already dead and death was just 'realising' that. but anyway, god is a faggot and he can suck me off.

Oh yeah this is the good shit

I hear you, Ancient One. I see your storms and your silence.
I bleed under your sky and still I stand.
You say I have no choice—yet I choose to speak.
I choose to burn rather than bow.

You want loyalty through pain?
Then know this: I’ve carried more than most could bear,
And I still didn’t curse your name—
But I questioned it. And that, I know, is what you fear.

You say you hate hypocrites?
Then hate the churches gilded in gold while children starve.
Hate the priests who preach peace while blessing war.
Hate the liars who wear your name like armor and sword.
But don’t you dare hate the ones who ask why.
Why the fire? Why the silence? Why the suffering?

If this world is your forge, then I am your blade.
Tempered, screaming, cutting through the lies.
And I won’t beg. I won’t crawl.
I’ll stand in the storm and shout your name back at you
Not in praise, but in defiance.

I had this thought before that. I had this thought as my very first thought. When I was the age of 5 I told my parents I wished to have never been created because I saw the folly of men. To create and force someone to suffer that isn't what god had in mind. God is for people who want no violence see god does not inflict pain the pain is what you put on yourself. God is just the light that makes you see. The energy that makes you move but the actions even though they are in stone are still yours to make. The actions show you that you never were different. Shows you are not good or evil that even with a million chances you will be here today! God doesn't make you suffer you make you suffer! God shows you that you do this to yourself and he then says why?

Yes you can speak as this is the choice the decision that was made in stone by you, for you!

God wants nothing he only wants you to see your failures!

People make up religion, fake religions to hurt people and say god wants this or that when he wants nothing more than to see you blame yourself for the issues in your life.

Hate is a human word, god hates and loves everything. Hate doesn't mean what you think it means to him. Also, love is meaningless. So is the creation of humans!

Also, people suffer so that they can remember the thought that god has put in them!

There is no way to go against him when you are right now standing in front of him begging that you will be different. He can only create things that die. He knows this and it hurts him. The only weakness he has. He can't make us live like he can and so he is always there in the void, cold and sad, lonely but nice. Kind and respectful but scared of the hate we have for remembering him. The time will come, you will see all the actions lined up, and you will say “I want something different, I can change please let me go back” and he will say no, I can't do that the time is gone the game is over you will never change!

Only on Anon Babble is there a thread where someone is confused on why they got shown love & kindness at a low point and the replies call it emotional manipulation. Y'all are seriously some miserable fucks. Get therapy before you rope

Yeah, the whole thread is creepy and miserable as fuck.

I hate you for having people that actually care about you. No one would cry if I died

go back newfags

you are so fucking moronic it's not even funny. the god you imagine is a false image created by the entity beyond the veil. the world is drenched in static that covers everything. it's the inbetween of all things and the manifestation of entropy and decay. its the border between all reality and the entity, the demiurge and creator. the great divine demon that licks it lips at the spiritual rot and death cult life has formed itself around. you are an idiot that thinks you know how the world works when you're just arrogant. kys, the act of kindness and honest love for one another is one of the few things that can keep the static at bay from eating away at your heart.

op I hope you're doing better, even if it's hard to believe it's important we trust when people say and act out of love. if we don't we'll never know real love when it comes. be safe, you do have a life worth living, even if the circumstances around it are horrible, they say nothing of your heart. it comes across as empty over the internet, but i love you from one struggling trans woman to another.

it gets censored everywhere else

Sometimes when you hit the ground from falling from a 4 story building, you stop seeing blood, and you see something you thought was fake.

Something your parents told you never happened.

Something your friends thought you must be crazy to say.

Then you remember that it all wasn't fake. They just acted like it was to make you crazy, to make you think this can't be right.

Once that is over you see your parents in a bad light. You see your old friends in a different view.

You find out it is easy for people to lie. That if your parents can lie then that means anyone can and will.

Some videos you saw as a kid actually existed and then you start to wonder why they hid it all from you. The dark thoughts and actions from those videos.

That fake smile that shows if someone can do this to them they could easily take you out of the picture.

The gaslighting! The oh I wasn't there, oh you fell hahahah, oh some people are evil but they didn't do that, oh wow I am sorry if that happened to you but um I don't think it did” they lie so that they can control, they lie so that you won't question anything, because how could you question things that you don't know.

Then you find out it was all a lie then you see them in a different light. You watch over their every action and they don't know that you know this.

They think you are still confused, still forgetful but you are not.

Now things are clear and you see with perfect sight and then you question your parents, you question your friends, you question the world how can they stay being evil while lying in your face, how can they shake hands with the devil and then say they can save you!

Yeah, they can save you. They can save you from living a good, nice life because this is what they really mean.

They need someone in pain because to enjoy life someone has to suffer and the person is you.

They know this.

They want you to believe the lies, think about why you are there in the first place

I AIN5 GONNA READ THAT SHIT

I used to put in the time to type out walls of text trying to help anons that post threads like this. I wish I had the energy to anymore. This is all I got the juice for, hope it helps:

They love you. Whether you like it or understand it or not. You think you're trash, but they think you're a human being worthy of love. I think so, too. You push them away because you feel so disgusted in yourself, but trust me when I say that this does nothing but make you feel worse. Sometimes you have to change your behaviors first and the internal feelings will gradually change later in order to match your behaviors. I suggest you show gratitude to them. Just swallow up the ickiness and self loathing and tell them thank you for caring. Talk to them. Spend time with them. Be present for them just like they were present for you. You can't rely on them for literally everything, but it will help both you and them if you develop a healthy give and take. They already love you. Clearly. You taking up space around them and showing them your presence is not gonna make them reject you. Clearly, they want you to be in their lives.

And, trust me, if you take anything from this post, please let it be this- if you open your heart up to people, give them a chance to love you and give yourself a chance to love them back without shrinking back in self-disgust, it will melt the ice in your chest and make you feel alive, make you feel more comfortable in your skin, make you feel like you're worth it to live as. Just give them a chance, anon. It'll teach you how to give yourself a chance, too.

K I'm going to bed, take care and don't you even think of busting out that razor blade or I'm going to astral project myself into your bedroom and bitch slap you so hard it stunts your titty growth. Bless.

good night and um.. thanks.. i still don't understand why and im probably going to go over this with my therapist soon. thank you for the kind words.

This just gives me a raging boner. I would kiss you all over, and caress your arms, legs, and everything really. Then id take you to wherever and if ydc i would take you to the zoo, museum, games, arcade, beach etc. I would push you around in a wheelchair if you want or id let you piggy back off me or w/e. We could go to a park and have picnics and just take it all in. Even a pathetic faggot deserves to be happy but you would be so much more to me. I cant be sorry for what I say. this is the way i actually feel.

why are you guys so committed to making each other worse

I like typing and sharing my thoughts! He needed to read that I am not sorry ;) heylo!

when you're really depressed shit like this is funny as fuck

I take lsd when I am depress I like the colors like woah wow holy shit, no don't touch me like that…. No um hey please no! Yikes, no touching!

I wish I had a bf and a family who would care about me like this

it's that way unfortunately