Be me 3 years ago, insecure autistic homosexual twink finishing highschool

Question

Be me 3 years ago, insecure autistic homosexual twink finishing highschool

be me 3 years ago, insecure autistic homosexual twink finishing highschool

bullied relentlessly by a lot of the class. 'Viktoria' in particular, rich and popular micro influencer instagram model

humiliated daily

be friend with local fujofaghag

start going to university

start getting confident and into my groove, don't be a scared and meek pushover anymore

fast forward three years

meet cute guy, 'Alexander', in new university class, tall, handsome, intelligent, both kind yet also authoritative

talk and hit it off quite well, really beginning to fall for him

ask him if he wants to grab a drink and he says yes

get text 'hey anon, is it okay if I bring my girlfriend'

get sad but can't say no now and I still wanna meet him despite of that

get there

it's fucking 'Viktoria', she doesn't initially recognise me but laughs when she's reminded

instantly get teary eyed, deteriorate to the same meek boy I was 3 years ago

accidentally confess I was into 'Alexander' after getting drunk off of cider because of shit tolerance

they both laugh

hurry home and cry

remain meek and sad

sadness turns into being horny

wank so much my dick gets sore

can't stop thinking about Alexander and Viktoria laughing at me

is it over guys? wtf do I do? they feel like gods compared to me, it's been over 2 weeks now and whenever I see 'Alexander' I feel so small and meek

haha, faggot

:(

bro have some fucking self respect you already knew he was straight just play it cool or ghost him if you can't not that complicated

Just forget them. It's not meant to be. Find other gay men to hang out with.

Draw a picture of this Viktoria and then burn it. You'll feel a lot better.

I can't ghost him he's a classmate I had to do

there are probably at least a dozen other ppl in your class that you never speak to, make him one of them

luckily the classes he and I share are over soon, going to do my best to forget but I still can't get over this humiliating feeling

Yeah, that's a deserted beach. We've all been there. You just have feel good about yourself. If you don't respect yourself, you will just drow in negative feelings.

Listen. You NEED to get him to fuck you. Record it, and send it to Viktoria

how the fuck am I supposed to compete with her?

If Alexander is still talking to you after you confessed your desire to let him ravage you, than the feeling is mutual.
Men don’t just prance around with dainty cute boys for fun.

maybe he's just polite

i think you need to fuck him bro

Bad idea. More likely just more pain.

i dont think any of this actually happened

Damn that's some Kafka/Mishima type shit, I guess some people are just naturally bottoms in nature, make your peace with it and learn to love your gentleness, you'll never hurt another person in the same way

is it over guys?

yes. sorry. even if you avoid them in particular the damage has been done

why are bottoms so pathetic

I'M TRYING

:(

TRY HARDER!

I've never been the most assertive but learning to love my gentleness or meekness, learning to embrace my deference in favour of others, while maybe my only chance at happiness, is a type of submission that genuinely hurts my pride. Maybe it's my childhood autistic insecurities where I wanted to prove I was just as capable as my peers that interferes but embracing being a natural bottom just feels like embracing my inferiority. And like sure maybe I'm not meant to lead but am I meant to submit? The whole thing just makes me feel like I'm scurrying around the legs of giants.

I can't compete with his girlfriend it's fucking unfair

unhelpful but holy shit thats so hot. I can't decide who in this story I want to be more.

God this is sad but also so hot I’ve started jerking off. Sorry anon. I genuinely feel bad for you but if I met you I’d probably just claim you and collar you and prevent any further social development.

t. Pathetic bottom enjoyer

when the fuck did my life turn into gay humiliation porn?

also wtf do you mean "prevent any further social development"???

why not? are you not cute?

I am (I think I am at least, horny old men in my DMs on social media seem to agree whenever I post pictures online) but she's just miles beyond me. She's a woman, some kind of instagram model, rich, with a more prestigious education, lined up for a better career and not a meek nervous wreck around people

I tried acting assertive with a guy once during some mutual flirting and he thought I was just being bratty, even when I try to act more take-charge it is assumed that I'm playing some kind of reverse psychology game to get dominated harder

get a bf into pathetic losers like yourself.

:(

It's not a bad thing.

I don't want to be a pathetic loser :(

why would you want to be anyone except Alexander or Viktoria?

you literally jerked off to somebody laughing at you big dog

I'll love you anon...

momentary lapse

I was here first.

back off, he's mine.

oh yeah this is me I guess

rapeable incel

wtf no

huh?

I am NOT "rapeable", under absolutely zero circumstances

does loveable work for you

no it ain't

what do you mean?

cute faggot built to be someones concubine

tiny bulge lol